Relearning old lessons while also learning anew …
I have been given a wonderful gift … a woman that is many rich and wonderful things including being my spiritual partner (http://seatofthesoul.com/free-tools/spiritual-partnership-guidelines/ ). At its simplest, spiritual partners are mutually committed to the development of the other partner’s self-growth as well as to their own. A Google or two, and reading the reference found in “Places along the way …” on this blog will offer more for those wanting deeper understanding.
Today my spiritual partner helped me. I am still on the mend from being sick, getting stronger each day but still unable to return to work. At work life goes on and tasks pile up, so I spent much of today with the intention of making my return to work next week as positive as possible. I had spent much of the day connected to work responding to email, processing a quickly growing stack of tasks, and coordinating work. By late afternoon I was deeply frustrated and angry … frustrated by things that I thought I had left behind when I discovered that focusing on what I could control gave me peace. Frustrated by things I thought were faults in others. I had slipped back, dropped into old patterns, and felt feelings coming from a place way before today.
I turned to my spiritual partner for help because it all felt wrong … not where I want to choose to be … and with the help of my spiritual partner I discovered. I discovered that … I lost sight of how walking without expectations improves the journey … I lost sight of how better it is to focus on those things you can control … I lost sight that if one looks for those things that give good feelings in any situation, one can discover the personal enjoyment found within them. And I lost sight of yet another tool so very useful when moving through life … the ability to view all people through compassionate eyes while recognizing they are doing the best they know how.
It was a powerful observation, brought on by my partner’s patient, guided tour through questions. There’s much more than what I’ll post tonight but the most “Ah-Ha” aspect for me was that I was not viewing people through compassionate eyes. I was seeing them as I wanted them to be, not as they were. Truthfully, it was all about me, not them. It wasn’t about what they were doing but how I was failing to see the truth and allowing that to connect with and surface old feelings. They are doing the best they can. I am better served by letting go and not resisting, processing my feelings to validate what’s up, and focusing on what I can offer to move everyone to a better outcome. That felt more like what I wanted to choose. Remember … it’s all about choices.
Compassion … when I realized it and took it in I could feel myself settle … I could feel my peace again … I could feel frustration and anger replaced by love and kindness. Yes, a powerful reaction … telling me how strong the Ah-Ha was for me … and that integrating compassion into my dealings at work and in life … making that word become deed and then become habit … will serve me well and move me further down my path.
It was a powerful moment … a powerful lesson … from a loving and powerful process. And I spent the remainder of the day thankful for yet one more gift given me by my dear, wonderful spiritual partner.