“Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain… To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices – today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it.” – Kevyn Aucoin
Today is a good day. A day meant to hear the music of old, inner songs and learn from their lyrics and melodies. Emotional songs … feelings … not typical music but moments from which I can see into my past, process and move through it, and set old songs aside as life’s journey continues to compose new melodies to hum as I move towards whatever destination is planned by the universe.
Each morning I spend several minutes moving through the news, gathering some sense of the world as they (those outside me) view it and choose to present it to its readers. And each morning I re-affirm my conviction that the world’s complexity and frequent negativity, and its prevalent mean-spirited behaviors makes me yearn for the peace offered from the trees singing from the wind swirling in high mountain theaters. That and similar images act as a vaccine against succumbing to the picture presented to thirsty readers. So much effort … so many sources of fearful energy yet also so many reminders to look at even the smallest “good” that shows itself and applaud it while letting go of the negative.
Much of my working life trained me to be pulled and guided by the negative. With encouragement from a close friend I now re-frame those patterns into more positive descriptions when doing the same work. At times, the old patterns still misdirect me, so I constantly work to program my cells to respond in more positive ways. Training my cells to see a healthier way of reacting … gathering the warmth of kind acts and conditions around me like cuddling inside a soft, warm comforter. The world will not promote it … so I must create it. I must discover that which gives emotional warmth then make choices that place me in the room holding it, not the rooms dark and drained of joyful color. I guess it’s my work … I guess it’s what needs to be clarified and processed as each of my days are spent moving towards becoming pure energy. Thinking … reflecting … feeling … gathering the good … letting go of old patterns … discarding expectations … and forgiving the world around me since I know that everyone is doing the best they can do. It is indeed a sometimes-confusing journey I am on … but it is the journey. A journey given me along with the ability to choose … choose to do whatever possible to wrap myself in the healing warmth of my joyful comforter. So, I learn to embrace it and make it mine … accept missteps and forgive myself … make choices bringing joyful luminescence regardless of the cloudy skies that might gather. Yes … it is my work, but it is also my choice and the life rhythm I wish to create. Yes … gather, collect, choose the warmth … and take yet another step … and another … and another …