“Intimacy is not purely physical. It’s the act of connecting with someone so deeply, you feel like you can see into their soul.” — Anonymous
I am one that enjoys the rich reprieve from life’s challenges offered by time away. Where some might plan “vacations”, I create retreats … prolonged windows of time where escape and deep, self-reflection is achieved. For the past several years, I begin each new year with a “retreat” to the beautiful Sonoma coast and spend a week or more in a remote yet very comfortable setting. Solitude, nature, views that inspire, and convenience to hiking are only some of the treasures I find while visiting. And among such treasures, I find the most precious golden coin … time to reflect and re-discover myself, my journey, and the intentions guiding my life.
This year’s retreat has ended. It has proved to be different than in past years, likely a result of the state of the world, COVID, and my own increasing awareness of my approaching life horizon. However, it’s also different because I am on the cusp of undertaking significant change, change possibly affecting key relationships and the directions I travel on my life’s journey into the final frontier.
I have placed upon the table my most significant relationships. Relationships and their connections are truly at my core. With them revealed, I can see how they “fit” into the puzzle of my life, and how they offer a diverse richness meeting my needs. I clearly see that am truly fortunate, for the collage of relationships I see before me have filled my heart with joy and richness. Even so, I sense a “gap” … some place where my inner voice suggests that something remains untapped within me, wanting to express itself within the context of deeper, more intimate connection.
So, with the loving help and encouragement from a trusted best friend, I have set sail on an adventure. A quest to find a loving, welcoming port to dock with so that feelings held within me and not yet surfaced can finally be released and experienced in their fullness. New seas offering unfamiliar currents and tides await me. As with many such adventures, discovery of the intended land is not guaranteed. But without stepping over the cliff while clutching trust, kindness, and love, one may never experience one, final truth … one final set of moments filled with the deepest of feelings spawned by the touching of souls. Feelings meant to be carried along into the next phase of existence.
Life is indeed a journey. Life never offers guarantees. Life is sometimes a walk close to the cliff’s edge. And life is occasionally and purposefully jumping over that cliff trusting that some soft place exists to land so that the journey can again continue. So, I have stepped … and we will see where I land.